My favorite gospel artist is William McDowell
One of my favorite songs is his ‘Falling on my Knees.’
It is a simple but incredibly heavy song and says,
“Falling on my knees, I bow down,
Some things I can’t see until I bow…”
2021 humbled me but as my BFF @nnamdiak says,
“First you’re humbled. Then, you become humble.”
There’s no short cut to learning true humility. And,
It’s inestimable because humility is a heart’s posture.
I sat with an aunt who has endured some hard knocks
Despite a longing for kids & marrying in her early 20s,
Her first, and only,child came when she was about 40
A challenging road that wrought a strong marriage
Built on laughter and love, despite intense sorrow.
We spoke for ages on life not meeting expectations.
I drove home shaking my head at myself.
Disappointment forces fault lines into our lives.
They still leak even when things smoothen up.
Often, we’re not wrestling things in existence.
We’re fighting leaky fault lines, after shocks of terror.
After several months of back to back triggers in 2021,
Our house felt fraught with tension.
As I drove from my aunt’s that day I asked myself this,
Why are we fighting? What’s the contention for?
I searched myself and realised so much standing
In my way was my own ego,
The human tendency for self-preservation above all.
So much is clearer from a posture of submission.
In our hypersensitive world, submission is taboo.
But, we’re constantly submitting. To something.
I’m talking of the submission derived from honestly,
Calling yourself to order. From a posture of humility,
A position of openness, listening. Vulnerability.
It’s the place where God is most able to use us.
Incidentally, it’s the posture where our relationships
Are most harmonious. The song ends like this:
“I can see clearly now, here on my knees.
I understand better now, here on my knees.”