As a child I loved adult columns in the dailies
I once read this odd article in the Vanguard,
Focused on a select group of women:
Women who’d only marry men,
If the men’s’ mothers were dead. Seriously. 
I mentioned it to my mum once and she said,
“Says more about the women than anything.”
The Mother-in-Law vs Wife storyline
Cuts cultures, classes and races.
When we got married-3 years ago in February-
My mother-in-law was largely the lovely woman
Who’d given me an exceptional man.
I liked her.
Then I had my preterm child & long hospital stay.
And I loved her.
She visited me every day,
Held this crying woman through some horrors,
Talked me through procedures,
Encouraged me to prioritize myself,
Gave me the confidence to threaten doctors,
Helped me through every new mom anxiety,
Stood in the gap for me time after time,
Forced us to make time to be a couple first,
And was the first to tell me,
“Babies are selfish, take care of yourself too.” •
I have so many instances of her kindness to me.
Today is her birthday and as I reflect on her,
I realise, my coming into her family,
Was God’s biggest birthday present to her .
I kid, I kid. Or not. 
I won the in-law lottery with my in-laws.🤷🏽‍♀️
Happy birthday, mummy!!
(Btw: I once asked a woman who had grown
To love a harsh mother-in-law, how she did it.
She told me,
“It’s hard to hate someone that loves your kids”
#SilverLiningOrNah?).