Greetings Plebs!

I write to you from a warm bed in a fantastically bourgeois neighbourhood nestled in the (very sophisticated) thumping heart of Paris. I’m feeling very lah-di-dah with myself, many thanks to my friends the lovely CoCo & Ste, for their impeccable style (and Co’s supreme snobbery). They’re the reason for this terribly fab location.

I’m on a mini-mini (mini) tour of sorts, 4 cities in 11 days, although I have to sign in to work daily and complete my portfolio…so it’s not exactly vacation-mode activated outchea. Regardless of work shade, I’m determined to enjoy my time. Paris is my first stop and I have all of 3 days to fall in love. So far, I’m heavily in like and totally considering a move here, I’ve been here twice already and every time I come I’m fascinated by how this city manages to combine classic chic with modern cool. Only Paris! My friends, the two gorgeous blondies who really should be an ad for The Kooples, tell me I really should move out here. Apparently, I fit right in with the lifestyle de la Parisienne, despite the fact that my french is surprisingly poor. Anyway, one of their arguments for a move to Paris is that I look the part of a Parisienne; I’m thin enough to be considered “Parfait!” in this modish society. Funny that this same figure in Nigeria would probably need a little more evidence of flesh to be labelled the same, “Parfait!”

That got me thinking as usual on how subjective beauty is. I mean, right in front of me is the perfect example of beauty’s unreliability. My boss was saying the other day how he had to talk to his 16 year old daughter and help her manage body issues because self image is such an entrenched part of self-esteem, and young women are particularly susceptible to skewed body images from contradictory media preaching perfection. It’s quite foolhardy to try to fit into one mold of what bodies should be. Imagine me beating myself up for not having wider hips, meanwhile across the world, slender hips are the belle du jour! Someone is out here starving themselves to be skinny meanwhile somewhere else beauty, is in what Nigerians refer to as “Having body!” in other words, being plump (that word should be an onomatopoeia btw). It goes to show that determining what beauty is today has nothing to do with the individual and everything to do with the external perception; the society’s opinion. Which, if you think about it logically, is ridiculous. For one thing, look at the news across the world today. With all the madness happening from Ferguson to Freetown, Sokoto to Soweto, do you really think the world is full of sane people? So how can we shape our opinions of ourselves by the decision of these questionable masses?

Because this crucial factor, that is how we see ourselves, is shaped by how someone else sees us we can never be happy with ourselves as long as the world is not satisfied with itself. The world is on an unquenchable quest for MORE to satisfy it’s incessant cravings; for power, lust, blood, money, fame etc. If my image of myself is based on the world’s perception I too will never be satisfied with what I have, with what I am, because there is always something more to be attained. This is why there is no settled format for perfection. At one point in time, the powers that be determined that bodacious bodies were all the rage, Marilyn Monroe reigned. At another time, the Kate Moss ‘Nothing Tastes as Good as Skinny Feels’ theory ruled, and women all over clambered unto that band wagon. Lumps and Humps supported by Fergie, Beyonce and JLo gave curvy women a banner to fight under and THAT became the preferred look. Today…oh hell, I don’t even know anymore.

If our self-image, and corresponding self-worth, is shaped by the changing feelings of another, how can we ever feel secure?

My body is not a fad. I’m not a trend. We’re talking of a machine that is designed to live for 100 years plus in the best conditions, it must be injurious to change it’s workings with every passing command.

“Parfait!” is a temporary standard. “Parfait…du jour!” is a more honest one. “Perfect…for today”. Healthy should probably be the standard we’re all struggling to meet because it’s the only basis for determination that is completely objective, factual, attainable and therefore reasonable.